“I’m going to make everything around me beautiful - that will be my life.” — Elsie de Wolfe

Thursday, 14 January 2010

Explosive Memories - (Beware of a Hot Wash)

Roll back twenty years and picture a busy young lady with a broken washing machine. So, she asks her boyfriend if while she was at work, he would mind taking her washing to a laundrette so that she wouldn't have to resort to appearing at the office in her pajamas! The next evening she was really happy to see him and her pile of newly washed and dried clothing, and she breathed a big sigh of relief.

Next day she dressed for work, donning her nice clean clothes and to add to the look she pulled on her high waisted 'control' knickers - black with lacy flowers, very effective and definitely much needed! - Excellent, off she went to work.

Then, sitting in a meeting later that morning she had the strangest sensation! all of a sudden she felt this popping, she shifted slightly in her seat and tried not to let her face show any trace of the strange thing that was happening in her knickers. It was very unnerving and started to pick up pace, she could bear it no longer and excused herself, (to the sound of much sighing and paper rustling) and hurried off to the ladies bathroom to investigate.

There to her horror, she discovered that her tight 'ladies stretch control briefs' were spouting holes like a sinking ship, and each new hole that appeared freed a perfect circle of her fat belly and bottom, protruding like little molehills popping up on a bowling green. It was a rare and unsettling sight! and it showed no sign of abating - they were popping like firecrackers, until she was more out, than in.

It transpired that ALL her washing had been done on the highest temperature the machine allowed - Luckily it was another two weeks before she found the pure new wool jumper!

(She made it a priority to buy herself a new washing machine - but, severely traumatised, it was a while before she could bring herself to buy another pair of 'high waisted ladies control briefs'! lol)


Shelagh said...

Mmmm, wonder if the boyfriend did it deliberately so he never had to do her wash again, or was he truly clueless.

Susannah said...

Neither he nor the girl had ever had any experience of laundrettes! or (exploding pants) before. I am sure it was an unfortunate (and in hindsight hilarious) accident! :-)

By the way, remember I am still waiting to hear your 5 highlights!!!

Ann said...

Funny! Delighted to discover I am not the only one to have suffered disasters with the so called control knickers and slips.

Susannah said...

I think there would be many with tales to tell anout them Ann! :-)

Thanks for dropping in and for your comment.


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